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Simon Sinek: Leadership, Hard Work, Optimism and the Infinite Game | Lex Fridman Podcast #82


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The following is a conversation with Simon Sinek,
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author of several books, including Start With Why,
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Leaders Eat Last, and his latest, The Infinite Game.
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He's one of the best communicators
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of what it takes to be a good leader,
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to inspire, and to build businesses
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that solve big, difficult challenges.
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This is the Artificial Intelligence Podcast.
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at Lex Friedman, spelled F R I D M A N.
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As usual, I'll do one or two minutes of ads now,
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and never any ads in the middle
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that can break the flow of the conversation.
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Quick summary of the ads.
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in the context of the history of money, is fascinating.
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I recommend Ascent of Money as a great book on this history.
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Chris Hatfield on Space Exploration,
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Neil deGrasse Tyson on Scientific Thinking
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00:02:43.260
and Communication, Will Wright, the creator of SimCity,
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and Sims on Game Design.
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I love that game.
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one of my favorite guitarists on guitar,
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Gary Kasparov on Chess, obviously I'm Russian,
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watch each all the way through from start to finish,
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Once again, sign up at masterclass.com slash Lex
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to get a discount and to support this podcast.
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And now, here's my conversation with Simon Sinek.
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In the Infinite Game, your most recent book,
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you describe the finite game and the infinite game,
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so from my perspective of artificial intelligence
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and game theory in general, I'm a huge fan of finite games
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from the broad philosophical sense,
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it's something that in the robotics,
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artificial intelligence space, we know how to deal with,
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and then you describe the infinite game,
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which has no exact static rules,
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has no well defined static objective,
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the players are known, unknown, they change,
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there's the dynamic element,
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so this is something that applies to business, politics,
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life itself, so can you try to articulate
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the objective function here of the infinite game,
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or in the cliche, broad philosophical sense,
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what is the meaning of life?
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Go for the, start with a softball.
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Yep, easy question first.
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So James Kars was the philosopher
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who originally articulated this concept
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of finite and infinite games,
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and when I learned about it,
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it really challenged my view of how the world works, right?
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Because I think we all think about winning
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and being the best and being number one,
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but if you think about it,
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only in a finite game can that exist,
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a game that has fixed rules, agreed upon objectives,
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and known players, like football or baseball,
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there's always a beginning, middle, and end,
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and if there's a winner, there has to be a loser.
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Infinite games, as Kars describes them,
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as you said, have known and unknown players,
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which means anyone can join,
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it has changeable rules,
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which means you can play however you want,
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and the objective is to perpetuate the game,
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to stay in the game as long as possible.
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In other words, there's no such thing
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as being number one or winning
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in a game that has no finish line.
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And what I learned is that when we try to win
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in a game that has no finish line,
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we try to be number, we try to be the best
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in a game that has no agreed upon objectives
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or agreed upon metrics or timeframes,
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there's a few consistent and predictable outcomes,
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the decline of trust, the decline of cooperation,
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the decline of innovation.
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And I find this fascinating because so many of the ways
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that we run most organizations is with a finite mindset.
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So trying to reduce the beautiful complex thing
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that is life or whatever, politics or business,
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into something very narrow,
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and in that process, the reductionist process,
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you lose something fundamental
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that makes the whole thing work in the long term.
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So returning, not gonna let you off the hook easy,
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what is the meaning of life?
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So what is the objective function
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that is worthwhile to pursue?
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Well, if you think about our tombstones, right?
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They have the date we were born and the date we died,
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but really it's what we do with the gap in between.
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There's a poem called The Dash.
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You know, it's the dash that matters.
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It's what we do between the time we're born
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and the time we die that gives our life meaning.
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And if we live our lives with a finite mindset,
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which means to accumulate more power or money
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than anybody else, to outdo everyone else,
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to be number one, to be the best,
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we don't take any of us with us.
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We don't take any of it with us.
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We just die.
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The people who get remembered the way we wanna be remembered
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is what kind of people we were, right?
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Devoted mother, loving father,
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what kind of person we were to other people.
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Jack Welch just died recently,
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and the Washington Post,
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when it wrote the headline for his obit,
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it wrote, he pleased Wall Street and distressed employees.
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And that's his legacy.
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A finite player who is obsessed with winning,
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who leaves behind a legacy of short term gains for a few
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and distress for many.
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That's his legacy.
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And every single one of us gets the choice
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of the kind of legacy we wanna have.
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Do we wanna be remembered for our contributions
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or our detractions?
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To live with a finite mindset,
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to live a career with a finite mindset,
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to be number one, be the best, be the most famous,
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you live a life like Jack Welch, you know?
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To live a life of service, to see those around us rise,
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to contribute to our communities, to our organizations,
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to leave them in better shape than we found them,
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that's the kind of legacy most of us would like to have.
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So day to day, when you think about
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what is the fundamental goals, dreams,
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motivations of an infinite game,
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of seeing your life, your career as an infinite game,
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what does that look like?
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I mean, I guess I'm sort of trying to stick
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on this personal ego, personal drive,
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the thing that the fire, the reason we wanna wake up
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in the morning and the reason we can't go to bed
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because we're so excited, what is that?
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So for me, it's about having a just cause.
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It's about a vision that's bigger than me,
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that my work gets to contribute
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to something larger than myself, you know?
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That's what drives me every day.
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I wake up every morning with a vision of a world
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that does not yet exist, a world in which the vast majority
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of people wake up every single morning inspired,
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feel safe at work and return home fulfilled
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at the end of the day.
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It is not the world we live in.
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And so that we still have work to do
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is the thing that drives me.
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You know, I know what my underlying values are.
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You know, I wake up to inspire people
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to do the things that inspire them.
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And these are the things that, these are the things that I,
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these are my go tos, my touch points
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that inspire me to keep working.
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You know, I think of a career like an iceberg.
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You know, if you have a vision for something,
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you're the only one who can see the iceberg
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underneath the ocean.
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But if you start working at it, a little bit shows up.
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And now a few other people can see what you imagine,
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be like, oh, right, yeah, no,
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I wanna help build that as well.
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And if you have a lot of success,
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then you have a lot of iceberg
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and people can see this huge iceberg
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and they say, you've accomplished so much.
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But what I see is all the work still yet to be done.
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You know, I still see the huge iceberg underneath the ocean.
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And so the growth, you talk about momentum.
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So the incremental revealing of the iceberg
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is what drives you.
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Well, it necessarily is incremental.
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What drives me is that, is the realization,
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is realizing the iceberg, bringing more of the iceberg
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from the unknown to the known,
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bringing more of the vision from the imagination to reality.
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And you have this fundamental vision of optimism.
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You call yourself an optimist.
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I mean, in this world, I have a sort of,
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I see myself a little bit as the main character
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from The Idiot by Dostoevsky,
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who is also kind of seen by society as a fool
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because he was optimistic.
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So one, can you maybe articulate
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where that sense of optimism comes from?
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And maybe also try to articulate your vision of the future
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where people are inspired, where optimism drives us.
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It's easy to forget that when you look at social media
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and so on, where the word toxicity and negativity
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can often get more likes,
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that optimism has a sort of a beauty to it.
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And I do hope it's out there.
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So can you try to articulate that vision?
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Yeah, so I mean, for me, optimism and being an optimist
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is just seeing the silver lining in every cloud.
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Even in tragedy, it brings people together.
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And the question is, can we see that?
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Can you see the beauty that is in everything?
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And I don't think optimism is foolishness.
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I don't think optimism is blindness,
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though it probably involves some naivete,
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the belief that things will get better,
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the belief that we tend towards the good,
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even in times of struggle or bad.
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You can't sustain war, but you can sustain peace.
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I think things that are stable are more sustainable,
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things that are optimistic are more sustainable
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than things that are chaotic.
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So you see people as fundamentally good.
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I mean, some people may disagree
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that you can't sustain peace, you can't sustain war.
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I mean, I think war is costly.
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It involves life and money,
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and peace does not involve those things.
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It requires work.
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I'm not saying it doesn't require work,
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but it doesn't drain resources,
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I think the same way that war does.
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The people that would say that we will always have war,
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and I just talked to the historian of Stalin,
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would say that conflict and the desire for power
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and conflict is central to human nature.
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I concur.
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But something in your words also,
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perhaps it's the naive aspect that I also share,
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is that you have an optimism
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that people are fundamentally good.
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I'm an idealist, and I think idealism is good.
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I'm not a fool to believe that the ideals
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that I imagine can come true.
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Of course, there'll never be world peace,
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but shouldn't we die trying?
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I think that's the whole point.
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That's the whole point of vision.
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Vision should be idealistic,
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and it should be, for all practical purposes, impossible.
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But that doesn't mean we shouldn't try,
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and it's the milestones that we reach
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that take us closer to that ideal
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that make us feel that our life and our work have meaning,
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and we're contributing to something bigger than ourselves.
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You know, just because it's impossible
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doesn't mean we shouldn't try.
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As I said, we're still moving the ball down the field.
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We're still making progress.
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Things are still getting better,
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even if we never get to that ideal state.
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So I think idealism is a good thing.
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You know, in the word infinite game,
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one of the beautiful and tragic aspects of life,
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human life at least, at least from the biological
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perspective, is that it ends.
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So sadly, it's.
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To some people, yeah.
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Fine, it's tragic to some people, or is it ends, it ends?
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I think some people believe that it ends on the day you die,
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and some people think it continues on.
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There's, and there's a lot of different ways
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to think what continues on even looks like.
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But let me drag it back to the personal.
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Sure.
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Which is, how do you think about your own mortality?
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Are you afraid of death?
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How do you think about your own death?
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I definitely haven't accomplished everything
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I want to contribute to.
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I would like more time on this earth
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to keep working towards that vision.
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Do you think about the fact that it ends for you?
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Are you cognizant of it?
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Of course I'm cognizant of it.
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I mean, aren't we all?
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I don't dwell on it.
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I'm aware of it.
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I know that my life is finite,
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and I know that I have a certain amount of time left
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on this planet, and I'd like to make that time be valuable.
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You know, some people would think that ideas
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kind of allow you to have a certain kind of immortality.
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Yeah.
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Maybe to linger on this kind of question.
link |
00:14:54.620
So first to push back on the,
link |
00:14:56.460
you said that everyone's cognizant of their mortality.
link |
00:14:58.840
There's a guy named Ernest Becker who would disagree,
link |
00:15:02.660
that you basically say that most of human cognition
link |
00:15:05.460
is created by us trying to create an illusion
link |
00:15:09.960
and try to hide the fact from ourselves,
link |
00:15:11.980
the fact that we're gonna die,
link |
00:15:13.360
to try to think that it's all gonna go on forever.
link |
00:15:17.000
But the fact that we know that it doesn't.
link |
00:15:19.540
Yes, but this mix of denial.
link |
00:15:21.820
I mean, I think the book's called Denial of Death.
link |
00:15:24.420
It's this constant denial that we're running away from.
link |
00:15:30.200
In fact, some would argue that the inspiration,
link |
00:15:33.740
the incredible ideas you've put out there,
link |
00:15:35.540
your TED Talk has been seen by millions
link |
00:15:37.500
and millions of people, right?
link |
00:15:38.820
It's just you trying to desperately fight the fact
link |
00:15:41.780
that you are biologically mortal.
link |
00:15:45.860
Your creative genius comes from the fact
link |
00:15:48.140
that you're trying to create ideas
link |
00:15:49.440
that live on long past you.
link |
00:15:52.180
Well, that's very nice of you.
link |
00:15:53.140
I mean, I would like my ideas to live on beyond me
link |
00:15:57.260
because I think that is a good test
link |
00:15:59.420
that those ideas have value in the lives of others.
link |
00:16:03.540
I think that's a good test.
link |
00:16:05.420
That others would continue to talk about
link |
00:16:08.780
or share the ideas long after I'm gone,
link |
00:16:12.560
I think is perhaps the greatest compliment
link |
00:16:16.420
one can get for one's own work.
link |
00:16:20.620
But I don't think it's my awareness of my mortality
link |
00:16:23.460
that drives me to do it.
link |
00:16:25.580
It's my desire to contribute that drives me to do it.
link |
00:16:30.100
It's the optimist vision.
link |
00:16:32.800
It's the pleasure and the fulfillment you get
link |
00:16:36.500
from inspiring others.
link |
00:16:38.600
It's as pure as that.
link |
00:16:42.060
Let me ask, listen, I'm rushing.
link |
00:16:43.380
I'm trying to get you to get you into these dark areas.
link |
00:16:47.360
Is the ego tied up into it somehow?
link |
00:16:50.020
So your name is extremely well known.
link |
00:16:54.460
If your name wasn't attached to it,
link |
00:16:56.100
do you think you would act differently?
link |
00:16:58.580
I mean, for years, I hated that my name was attached to it.
link |
00:17:02.280
I had a rule for years that I wouldn't have my face
link |
00:17:06.100
on the front page of the website.
link |
00:17:09.820
I had a fight with the publisher
link |
00:17:10.900
because I didn't want my name big on the book.
link |
00:17:14.080
I wanted it tiny on the book.
link |
00:17:15.500
Because I kept telling them it's not about me,
link |
00:17:17.100
it's about the ideas.
link |
00:17:18.220
They wanted to put my name on the top of my book, I refused.
link |
00:17:20.660
None of my books have my names on the top
link |
00:17:22.460
because I won't let them.
link |
00:17:25.300
They would like very much to put my name
link |
00:17:26.560
on the top of the book,
link |
00:17:27.400
but the idea has to be bigger than me.
link |
00:17:30.260
I'm not bigger than the idea.
link |
00:17:32.060
That's beautifully put.
link |
00:17:32.900
Do you think ego?
link |
00:17:34.460
But I also am aware that I've become recognized
link |
00:17:38.020
as the messenger.
link |
00:17:39.340
And even though I still think the message is bigger than me,
link |
00:17:41.980
I recognize that I have a responsibility as the messenger.
link |
00:17:45.160
And whether I like it or not is irrelevant.
link |
00:17:47.580
I accept the responsibility, I'm happy to do it.
link |
00:17:53.060
I'm not sure how to phrase this,
link |
00:17:54.760
but there's a large part of the culture right now
link |
00:17:58.940
that emphasizes all the things that nobody disagrees with,
link |
00:18:03.420
which is health, sleep, diet, relaxation,
link |
00:18:07.100
meditation, vacation, are really important.
link |
00:18:10.340
And there's no, it's like,
link |
00:18:11.740
you can't really argue against that.
link |
00:18:13.460
In fact, people.
link |
00:18:14.420
Less sleep.
link |
00:18:16.040
Less.
link |
00:18:16.880
Just, I'm joking.
link |
00:18:17.700
Yes, well, that's the thing.
link |
00:18:18.940
I often speak to the fact that passion
link |
00:18:23.820
and love for what you're doing and the two words hard work,
link |
00:18:28.320
especially in the engineering fields,
link |
00:18:30.320
are more important than,
link |
00:18:32.540
are more important to prioritize than sleep.
link |
00:18:35.880
Even though sleep is really important,
link |
00:18:38.140
your mind should be obsessed with the hard work,
link |
00:18:40.560
with the passion, and so on.
link |
00:18:41.860
And then I get some pushback, of course, from people.
link |
00:18:44.900
What do you make sense of that?
link |
00:18:46.100
Is that just me, the crazy Russian engineer,
link |
00:18:49.140
really pushing hard work?
link |
00:18:50.340
Probably.
link |
00:18:52.460
I think that that's a short term strategy.
link |
00:18:55.120
I think if you sacrifice your health for the work,
link |
00:18:57.900
at some point, it catches up with you.
link |
00:19:00.380
And at some point, it's like going, going, going,
link |
00:19:02.500
and you get sick.
link |
00:19:03.460
Your body will shut down for you
link |
00:19:04.740
if you refuse to take care of yourself.
link |
00:19:07.940
You get sick.
link |
00:19:09.080
It's what happens.
link |
00:19:09.920
Sometimes, more severe illness
link |
00:19:12.540
than something that just slows you down.
link |
00:19:14.240
So I think taking, getting sleep,
link |
00:19:17.940
I mean, there have been studies on this that,
link |
00:19:20.900
executives, for example, who get a full night's sleep
link |
00:19:24.060
and stop at a reasonable hour,
link |
00:19:26.020
actually accomplish more, are more productive
link |
00:19:29.620
than people who work and burn the midnight oil
link |
00:19:31.540
because their brains are working better
link |
00:19:33.500
because they're well rested.
link |
00:19:35.380
So, you know, working hard, yes,
link |
00:19:37.940
but why not work smart?
link |
00:19:41.180
I think that giving our minds and our bodies rest
link |
00:19:45.380
makes us more efficient.
link |
00:19:47.500
I think just driving, driving, driving, driving
link |
00:19:49.220
is a short term, it's a short term strategy.
link |
00:19:52.100
So, but to push back on that a little bit,
link |
00:19:54.300
the annoying thing is you're like 100% right
link |
00:19:57.020
in terms of science, right?
link |
00:19:58.660
But the thing is, because you're 100% right,
link |
00:20:02.940
that weak part of your mind uses that fact
link |
00:20:07.540
to convince you, like what, so, you know,
link |
00:20:10.140
I get all kinds of, my mind comes up
link |
00:20:12.100
with all kinds of excuses to try to convince me
link |
00:20:14.300
that I shouldn't be doing what I'm doing.
link |
00:20:16.020
To rationalize. To rationalize.
link |
00:20:18.060
And so what I have a sense,
link |
00:20:21.300
I think what you said about executives and leaders
link |
00:20:23.820
is absolutely right, but there's the early days.
link |
00:20:26.860
The early days of madness and passion.
link |
00:20:29.100
For sure.
link |
00:20:29.940
Then I feel like emphasizing sleep,
link |
00:20:33.700
thinking about sleep is giving yourself a way out
link |
00:20:37.580
from the fact that those early days,
link |
00:20:39.500
especially, can be suffering.
link |
00:20:42.800
As long, it's not sustainable.
link |
00:20:45.700
You know, it's not sustainable.
link |
00:20:46.980
Sure, if you're investing all that energy in something
link |
00:20:50.140
at the beginning to get it up and running,
link |
00:20:52.620
then at some point you're gonna have to slow down.
link |
00:20:55.660
Or your body will slow you down for you.
link |
00:20:57.580
Like, you can choose or your body can choose.
link |
00:21:01.820
I mean.
link |
00:21:02.660
So, okay, so you don't think, from my perspective,
link |
00:21:04.820
it feels like people have gotten a little bit soft.
link |
00:21:07.380
But you're saying, no.
link |
00:21:08.220
I think that there seems evidence
link |
00:21:11.140
that working harder and later have taken a back seat.
link |
00:21:16.140
I've taken a back seat.
link |
00:21:21.580
I think we have to be careful with broad generalizations.
link |
00:21:24.660
But I think if you go into the workplace,
link |
00:21:28.140
there are people who would complain
link |
00:21:29.540
that more people now than before,
link |
00:21:33.300
you know, look at their watches and say,
link |
00:21:34.940
oops, five o clock, goodbye.
link |
00:21:36.580
Right?
link |
00:21:37.420
Now, is that a problem with the people?
link |
00:21:39.580
You're saying it's the people giving themselves excuses
link |
00:21:41.700
and people who don't work hard.
link |
00:21:42.960
Or is it the organizations aren't giving them something
link |
00:21:45.040
to believe in, something to be passionate about?
link |
00:21:46.820
We can't manufacture passion.
link |
00:21:48.100
You can't just tell someone, be passionate.
link |
00:21:51.040
You know, that's not how it works.
link |
00:21:52.360
Passion's an output, not an input.
link |
00:21:55.420
Like if I believe in something
link |
00:21:56.440
and I wanna contribute all that energy to do it,
link |
00:21:58.780
we call that passion.
link |
00:22:00.220
You know, working hard for something we love is passion.
link |
00:22:02.340
Working hard for something we don't care about
link |
00:22:04.140
is called stress.
link |
00:22:05.260
But we're working hard either way.
link |
00:22:07.760
So I think the organizations bear some accountability
link |
00:22:10.380
and our leaders bear some accountability,
link |
00:22:11.680
which is if they're not offering a sense of purpose,
link |
00:22:13.580
if they're not offering us a sense of cause,
link |
00:22:15.500
if they're not telling us that our work is worth more
link |
00:22:17.660
than simply the money it makes,
link |
00:22:19.780
then yeah, I'm gonna come at five o clock
link |
00:22:21.140
because I don't really care about making you money.
link |
00:22:23.180
Remember, we live in a world right now
link |
00:22:24.620
where a lot of people, rather a few people,
link |
00:22:26.980
are getting rich on the hard work of others.
link |
00:22:29.700
And so I think when people look up and say,
link |
00:22:33.020
well, why would I do that?
link |
00:22:34.620
I'll just, if you're not gonna look after me
link |
00:22:36.600
and then you're gonna lay me off at the end of the year
link |
00:22:38.180
because you missed your arbitrary projections,
link |
00:22:40.460
you know, you're gonna lay me off
link |
00:22:41.740
because you missed your arbitrary projections,
link |
00:22:43.940
then why would I offer my hard work and loyalty to you?
link |
00:22:47.420
So I think, I don't think we can immediately blame people
link |
00:22:50.740
for going soft.
link |
00:22:51.940
I think we can blame leaders for their inability
link |
00:22:56.980
or failure to offer their people something bigger
link |
00:22:59.420
than making a product or making money.
link |
00:23:02.660
Yeah, so that's brilliant.
link |
00:23:04.300
And start with why, leaders eat less, your books.
link |
00:23:07.940
You basically talk about what it takes to be a good leader.
link |
00:23:13.980
And so some of the blame should go on the leader,
link |
00:23:15.700
but how much of it is on finding your passion?
link |
00:23:19.900
How much is it on the individual?
link |
00:23:21.900
And allowing yourself to pursue that passion,
link |
00:23:24.780
pushing yourself to your limits,
link |
00:23:26.140
to really take concrete steps
link |
00:23:30.220
along your path towards that passion.
link |
00:23:33.220
Yeah, there's mutual responsibility.
link |
00:23:34.620
There's mutual accountability.
link |
00:23:35.540
I mean, we're responsible as individuals
link |
00:23:37.380
to find the organizations and find the leaders
link |
00:23:39.980
that inspire us.
link |
00:23:41.180
And organizations are responsible for maintaining
link |
00:23:43.420
that flame and giving people who believe
link |
00:23:46.380
what they believed, you know, a chance to contribute.
link |
00:23:50.580
Sort of to linger on it,
link |
00:23:51.780
have you by chance seen the movie Whiplash?
link |
00:23:54.020
Yes.
link |
00:23:56.500
Again, maybe I'm romanticizing suffering.
link |
00:23:59.380
Again. It's the Russian in you.
link |
00:24:00.420
It's the Russian. Yeah.
link |
00:24:01.660
The Russians love suffering.
link |
00:24:03.380
But for people who haven't seen,
link |
00:24:07.660
the movie Whiplash has a drum instructor
link |
00:24:10.860
that pushes the drum musician to his limits
link |
00:24:16.540
to bring out the best in him.
link |
00:24:18.660
And there's a toxic nature to it.
link |
00:24:20.420
There's suffering in it.
link |
00:24:21.780
Like you've worked with a lot of great leaders,
link |
00:24:24.300
a lot of great individuals.
link |
00:24:25.500
So is that toxic relationship as toxic
link |
00:24:29.380
as it appears in the movie?
link |
00:24:30.460
Or is that fundamental?
link |
00:24:31.420
I've seen that relationship,
link |
00:24:33.620
especially in the past with Olympic athletes,
link |
00:24:36.420
especially in athletics, extreme performers
link |
00:24:39.780
seem to do wonders.
link |
00:24:40.860
It does wonders for me.
link |
00:24:42.060
There's some of my best relationships,
link |
00:24:44.900
now I'm not representative of everyone certainly,
link |
00:24:47.660
but some of my best relationships for mentee and mentor
link |
00:24:51.100
have been toxic from an external perspective.
link |
00:24:56.420
What do you make of that movie?
link |
00:24:57.700
What do you make of that kind of relationship?
link |
00:25:00.580
That's not my favorite movie.
link |
00:25:04.140
Okay, so you don't think that's a healthy,
link |
00:25:06.940
you don't think that kind of relationship
link |
00:25:08.660
is a great example of a great leader?
link |
00:25:11.940
No, I think it's a short term strategy.
link |
00:25:13.060
I mean, short term.
link |
00:25:13.900
I mean, look, being hard on someone
link |
00:25:15.460
is not the same as toxicity.
link |
00:25:18.580
If you go to the Marine Corps,
link |
00:25:21.900
a drill instructor will be very hard on their Marines.
link |
00:25:26.140
And then, but still, even on the last day of bootcamp,
link |
00:25:29.500
they'll take their hat off and they'll become a human.
link |
00:25:32.020
But of all the drill instructors,
link |
00:25:34.820
you know, the three or four main drill instructors
link |
00:25:38.740
assigned to a group of recruits,
link |
00:25:40.500
the one that they all want the respect of
link |
00:25:42.100
is the one that's the hardest on them.
link |
00:25:44.100
That's true.
link |
00:25:45.820
And you hear, you know,
link |
00:25:47.660
there's plenty of stories of people
link |
00:25:48.660
who want to earn the respect of a hard parent
link |
00:25:50.940
or a hard teacher.
link |
00:25:53.100
But fundamental, that parent, that teacher,
link |
00:25:55.020
that drill instructor has to believe in that person,
link |
00:25:57.300
has to see potential in them.
link |
00:25:58.620
It's not a formula,
link |
00:25:59.860
which is if I'm hard on people, they'll do well,
link |
00:26:01.940
which is there has to still be love.
link |
00:26:04.100
It has to be done with absolute love.
link |
00:26:05.980
And it has to be done responsibly.
link |
00:26:08.980
I mean, some people can take
link |
00:26:09.860
a little more pressure than others,
link |
00:26:11.780
but it's not, I think it's irresponsible
link |
00:26:13.860
to think of it as a formula
link |
00:26:15.700
that if I'm just toxic at people, they will do well.
link |
00:26:20.460
It depends on their personalities.
link |
00:26:21.820
First of all, it works for some, but not all.
link |
00:26:23.900
And second of all, it can't be done willy nilly.
link |
00:26:27.540
It has to still be done with care and love.
link |
00:26:29.980
And sometimes you can get equal or better results
link |
00:26:36.220
without all of the toxicity.
link |
00:26:37.700
So one of the, I guess toxicity on my part
link |
00:26:41.900
was a really bad word to use,
link |
00:26:43.540
but if we talk about what makes a good leader
link |
00:26:46.420
and just look at an example in particular,
link |
00:26:49.660
looking at Elon Musk,
link |
00:26:51.220
he's known to push people to their limits
link |
00:26:54.220
in a way that I think really challenges people
link |
00:27:01.340
in a way they've never been challenged before
link |
00:27:03.060
to do the impossible.
link |
00:27:04.420
But it can really break people.
link |
00:27:07.300
And jobs was hard and Amazon is hard.
link |
00:27:11.260
But the thing that's important is none of them lie about it.
link |
00:27:15.220
People ask me about Amazon all the time.
link |
00:27:16.420
Like Jeff Bezos never lied about it.
link |
00:27:18.780
Even the ones who like Amazon don't last
link |
00:27:20.460
more than a couple of years before they burn out.
link |
00:27:22.860
But when we're honest about the culture,
link |
00:27:25.340
then it gives people the opportunity
link |
00:27:26.620
who like to work in that kind of culture
link |
00:27:28.100
to choose to work in that kind of culture,
link |
00:27:29.940
as opposed to pretending and saying,
link |
00:27:31.380
oh no, this is all, it's all lovey lovey here.
link |
00:27:34.500
And then you show up and it's the furthest thing from it.
link |
00:27:37.260
So, I mean, I think the reputations
link |
00:27:41.420
of putting a lot of pressure on people to,
link |
00:27:44.060
jobs was not an easy man to work for.
link |
00:27:48.780
He pushed people, but everyone who worked there
link |
00:27:50.940
was given the space to create and do things
link |
00:27:52.980
that they would not have been able to do anywhere else
link |
00:27:54.740
and work at a level that they didn't work anywhere else.
link |
00:27:56.980
And jobs didn't have all the answers.
link |
00:27:58.740
I mean, he pushed his people to come up with answers.
link |
00:28:02.100
He wasn't just looking for people to execute his ideas.
link |
00:28:07.460
And people did, people accomplished more
link |
00:28:09.220
than they thought they were capable of, which is wonderful.
link |
00:28:12.300
How do you, you're talking about the infinite game
link |
00:28:16.500
and not thinking about too short term.
link |
00:28:19.820
And yet you see some of the most brilliant people
link |
00:28:22.860
in the world being pushed by Elam us
link |
00:28:24.740
to accomplish some of the most incredible things.
link |
00:28:27.060
When we're talking about autopilot,
link |
00:28:28.420
when we're talking about some of the hardware engineering,
link |
00:28:32.020
and they do some of the best work of their life
link |
00:28:35.180
and then leave.
link |
00:28:37.340
How do you balance that in terms of what it takes
link |
00:28:40.300
to be a good leader,
link |
00:28:41.700
what it takes to accomplish great things in your life?
link |
00:28:44.660
So I think there's a difference between someone
link |
00:28:49.380
who can get a lot out of people in the short term
link |
00:28:52.660
and building an organization
link |
00:28:53.700
that can sustain beyond any individual.
link |
00:28:57.180
There's a difference.
link |
00:28:58.060
When you say beyond any individual,
link |
00:28:59.420
you mean beyond like if the leader dies.
link |
00:29:03.020
Correct.
link |
00:29:03.860
Like could Tesla continue to do what it's doing
link |
00:29:05.540
without Elon Musk?
link |
00:29:08.540
And you're perhaps implying,
link |
00:29:10.700
which is a very interesting question that it cannot.
link |
00:29:13.660
I don't know.
link |
00:29:15.100
You know, the argument you're making
link |
00:29:16.420
of this person who pushes everyone
link |
00:29:20.140
arguably is not a repeatable model, right?
link |
00:29:23.340
You know, is Apple the same without Steve Jobs
link |
00:29:25.780
or is it slowly moving in a different direction?
link |
00:29:29.860
Or has he established something
link |
00:29:31.060
that could be resurrected with the right leader?
link |
00:29:34.060
That was his dream, I think,
link |
00:29:35.700
is to build an organization that lives on beyond them.
link |
00:29:39.940
At least I remember reading that somewhere.
link |
00:29:40.780
I think that's what a lot of leaders desire,
link |
00:29:44.340
which is to create something that was bigger than them.
link |
00:29:47.340
You know, most businesses, most entrepreneurial ventures
link |
00:29:51.500
could not pass the school bus test,
link |
00:29:54.900
which is if the founder was hit by a school bus,
link |
00:29:57.180
would everyone continue the business without them
link |
00:29:58.820
or would they all just go find jobs?
link |
00:30:01.140
And the vast majority of companies would fail that test,
link |
00:30:04.820
you know, especially in the entrepreneurial world
link |
00:30:08.300
that if you take the inspired visionary leader away,
link |
00:30:11.020
the whole thing collapses.
link |
00:30:12.380
So is that a business
link |
00:30:13.660
or is that just a force of personality?
link |
00:30:15.940
And a lot of entrepreneurs, you know, face that reality,
link |
00:30:19.300
which is they have to be in every meeting,
link |
00:30:20.580
make every decision, you know, come up with every idea,
link |
00:30:24.100
because if they don't, who will?
link |
00:30:25.860
And the question is, is, well,
link |
00:30:27.380
what have you done to build your bench?
link |
00:30:31.100
Is it, it's not, sometimes it's ego,
link |
00:30:33.380
the belief that only I can.
link |
00:30:35.420
Sometimes it's just things got,
link |
00:30:39.700
did so well for so long that just forgot.
link |
00:30:43.660
And sometimes it's a failure
link |
00:30:48.300
to build the training programs or hire the right people
link |
00:30:51.860
that could replace you,
link |
00:30:53.780
who are maybe smarter and better.
link |
00:30:58.020
And browbeating people is only one strategy.
link |
00:31:01.500
I don't think it's necessarily the only strategy,
link |
00:31:03.500
nor is it always the best strategy.
link |
00:31:05.100
I think people get to choose the cultures
link |
00:31:07.140
they wanna work in.
link |
00:31:07.980
This is why I think companies should be honest
link |
00:31:12.860
about the kind of culture that they've created.
link |
00:31:16.100
You know, I heard a story about Apple
link |
00:31:18.100
where somebody came in from a big company,
link |
00:31:21.340
you know, he had accomplished a lot
link |
00:31:23.380
and his ego was very large
link |
00:31:26.220
and he was going on about how he did this and he did that
link |
00:31:28.420
and he did this and he did that.
link |
00:31:30.460
And somebody from Apple said,
link |
00:31:32.340
we don't care what you've done.
link |
00:31:34.580
The question is, what are you gonna do?
link |
00:31:36.420
And that's, you know, for somebody who wants to be pushed,
link |
00:31:41.420
that's the place you go because you choose to be pushed.
link |
00:31:45.620
Now, we all wanna be pushed to some degree,
link |
00:31:47.460
you know, anybody who wants to, you know,
link |
00:31:49.700
accomplish anything in this world
link |
00:31:50.740
wants to be pushed to some degree,
link |
00:31:51.980
whether it's through self pressure or external pressure
link |
00:31:55.220
or, you know, public pressure, whatever it is.
link |
00:31:59.860
But I think this whole idea of one size fits all
link |
00:32:02.940
is a false narrative of how leadership works,
link |
00:32:05.740
but what all leadership requires is creating an environment
link |
00:32:08.580
in which people can work at their natural best.
link |
00:32:10.540
But you have a sense that it's possible
link |
00:32:12.940
to create a business where it lives on beyond you.
link |
00:32:17.780
So if we look at now,
link |
00:32:19.740
if we just look at this current moment,
link |
00:32:21.820
I just recently talked to Jack Dorsey, CEO of Twitter,
link |
00:32:25.100
and he's under a lot of pressure now.
link |
00:32:26.780
I don't know if you're aware of the news
link |
00:32:28.180
that he's being pushed out as a potential CEO of Twitter
link |
00:32:31.700
because he's the CEO already
link |
00:32:33.140
of an incredibly successful company
link |
00:32:35.180
plus he wants to go to Africa to live a few months in Africa
link |
00:32:39.180
to connect with the world that's outside of the Silicon Valley
link |
00:32:43.820
and sort of, there's this idea,
link |
00:32:45.780
well, can Twitter live without Jack?
link |
00:32:48.420
We'll find out.
link |
00:32:50.260
But you have a general, as a student of great leadership,
link |
00:32:55.660
you have a general sense that it's possible.
link |
00:32:57.540
Yeah, of course it's possible.
link |
00:32:58.540
I mean, what Bill Gates built with Microsoft
link |
00:33:01.660
may not have survived Steve Ballmer
link |
00:33:04.260
if the company weren't so rich,
link |
00:33:06.540
but Sachin Ardala is putting it back on track again.
link |
00:33:11.260
It's become a visionary company again.
link |
00:33:12.900
It's attracting great talent again.
link |
00:33:14.060
It went through a period
link |
00:33:14.900
where they couldn't get the best talent
link |
00:33:16.500
and the best talent was leaving.
link |
00:33:17.860
Now people wanna work for Microsoft again.
link |
00:33:19.660
Well, that's not because of pressure.
link |
00:33:21.900
Ballmer put more pressure on people
link |
00:33:24.340
mainly to hit numbers than anything else.
link |
00:33:26.940
That didn't work.
link |
00:33:28.660
Yes. Right?
link |
00:33:30.500
And so the question is,
link |
00:33:31.980
what kind of pressure are we putting on people?
link |
00:33:33.340
We're putting on pressure people to hit numbers
link |
00:33:35.580
or hit arbitrary deadlines,
link |
00:33:38.140
or we're putting on pressure on people
link |
00:33:39.420
because we believe that they can do better work.
link |
00:33:41.900
And the work that we're trying to do
link |
00:33:44.340
is to advance a vision that's bigger than all of us.
link |
00:33:46.580
And if you're gonna put pressure on people,
link |
00:33:47.900
it better be for the right reason.
link |
00:33:49.700
Like if you're gonna put pressure on me,
link |
00:33:50.940
it better be for a worthwhile reason.
link |
00:33:52.460
If it's just to hit a goal,
link |
00:33:54.300
if it's just to hit some arbitrary date
link |
00:33:55.900
or some arbitrary number or make a stock price
link |
00:33:58.100
hit some target, you can keep it, I'm outta here.
link |
00:34:01.060
But if you wanna put pressure on me
link |
00:34:02.140
because we are brothers and sisters in arms
link |
00:34:06.900
working to advance a cause bigger than ourselves,
link |
00:34:09.020
that we believe whatever we're gonna build
link |
00:34:10.660
will significantly contribute
link |
00:34:12.340
to the greater good of society,
link |
00:34:14.140
then go ahead, I'll take the pressure.
link |
00:34:16.220
And if you look at the Apples
link |
00:34:17.380
and if you look at the Elon Musk's,
link |
00:34:23.060
the Jobs and the Elon Musk,
link |
00:34:24.100
they fundamentally believed that what they were doing
link |
00:34:26.060
would improve society.
link |
00:34:27.460
And it was for the good of humankind.
link |
00:34:31.140
And so the pressure, in other words,
link |
00:34:33.740
what they were doing was more important,
link |
00:34:36.020
more valuable than any individual on the team.
link |
00:34:39.820
And so the pressure they put on people
link |
00:34:41.140
served a greater good.
link |
00:34:42.900
And so we looked to the left
link |
00:34:45.620
and we looked to the right to each other and said,
link |
00:34:47.500
we're in this together.
link |
00:34:49.060
We accept this, we want this.
link |
00:34:51.540
But if it's just pressure to hit a number
link |
00:34:54.820
or make the widget move a little faster,
link |
00:35:01.220
that's soul sucking.
link |
00:35:03.540
That's not passion, that's stress.
link |
00:35:06.580
And I think a lot of leaders confuse
link |
00:35:11.140
that making people work hard
link |
00:35:12.260
is not what makes them passionate.
link |
00:35:15.060
Giving to them something to believe in
link |
00:35:17.540
and work on is what drives passion.
link |
00:35:20.860
And when you have that, then turning up the pressure
link |
00:35:23.100
only brings people together,
link |
00:35:26.580
drives them further.
link |
00:35:27.420
If done the right way.
link |
00:35:28.820
If done the right way.
link |
00:35:30.740
Speaking of pressure,
link |
00:35:32.260
I'm gonna give you 90 seconds to answer the last question,
link |
00:35:36.980
which is if I told you that tomorrow
link |
00:35:39.420
was your last day to live,
link |
00:35:41.140
we talked about mortality,
link |
00:35:42.860
sunrise to sunset, can you tell me,
link |
00:35:45.260
can you take me through the day?
link |
00:35:46.300
What do you think that day would involve?
link |
00:35:48.460
You can't spend it with your family,
link |
00:35:50.220
I told you as well.
link |
00:35:52.060
I would probably want to fill all of my senses
link |
00:35:54.940
with things that excite my senses.
link |
00:35:59.100
I'd want to look at beautiful art.
link |
00:36:00.420
I'd want to listen to beautiful music.
link |
00:36:02.860
I'd want to taste incredible food.
link |
00:36:04.900
I'd want to smell amazing tastes.
link |
00:36:06.900
I'd want to touch something that's beautiful to touch.
link |
00:36:14.100
I'd want all of my senses to just be consumed
link |
00:36:19.180
with things that I find beautiful.
link |
00:36:21.100
And you talked about this idea of
link |
00:36:23.260
we don't do it often these days,
link |
00:36:24.780
of just listening to music, turning off all the devices
link |
00:36:27.380
and actually taking in and listening to music.
link |
00:36:29.820
So as an addendum,
link |
00:36:33.300
if we were to talk about music,
link |
00:36:34.500
what song would you be blasting
link |
00:36:36.420
on this last day you're alive?
link |
00:36:38.100
Is it Led Zeppelin?
link |
00:36:39.060
What are we talking about?
link |
00:36:39.900
That I love.
link |
00:36:40.740
No, no.
link |
00:36:41.580
There's probably gonna be a Beatles song in there.
link |
00:36:42.940
There'll definitely be some Beethoven in there.
link |
00:36:46.460
The classics.
link |
00:36:47.500
The classics.
link |
00:36:48.340
Yeah, exactly.
link |
00:36:49.180
Well, thank you so much for talking today.
link |
00:36:51.860
Thank you for making time for it.
link |
00:36:53.620
Under pressure, we made it happen.
link |
00:36:55.420
It was great.
link |
00:36:56.860
Thanks for listening to this conversation
link |
00:36:58.420
with Simon Sinek.
link |
00:36:59.740
And thank you to our sponsors, Cash App and Masterclass.
link |
00:37:03.660
Please consider supporting the podcast
link |
00:37:05.380
by downloading Cash App and using code LexPodcast
link |
00:37:09.060
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link |
00:37:14.620
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link |
00:37:17.260
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link |
00:37:19.780
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link |
00:37:21.060
or simply connect with me on Twitter at Lex Friedman.
link |
00:37:25.420
And now let me leave you with some words from Simon Sinek.
link |
00:37:29.100
There are only two ways to influence human behavior.
link |
00:37:32.340
You can manipulate it or you can inspire it.
link |
00:37:35.460
Thank you for listening and hope to see you next time.